Hello! It’s been a while since you’ve heard from me for a mishmash of reasons which I won’t bore you with. Instead, let’s head right into the action. I discovered that Groupon is in France. I don’t know how long Groupon has been here, but I signed up right away and the daily inbox clutter began. For more than a month, the following offer kept appearing:
So, for the bargain price of 119€, I can hang out in a giant plastic tent that looks like it offers very little privacy with its see-through structure, and probably heats up like an ant under a magnifying glass (especially after this summer’s heatwave in France).
With all that sun streaming through, guests must be up with the sparrows. As the dome heats up, throwing off the bed linen and sprawling naked on the hot bed probably isn’t the best option — just in case someone happens to wander on past.
At night, is there a door to close or can any old animal wander in and gnaw at your feet? Is there a chance waking up with a goat on the bed? As an Australian, I have to wonder about spiders and snakes. And don’t even get me started on mosquito bites in a country that doesn’t embrace fly screens.
And what if it rains? Does water seep in underneath? Is the sound of the rain so loud that earplugs are required? Are umbrellas and boots supplied to help guests get to the shower (wherever it is) before taking a nature shower in the rain? As well as an umbrella and boots, is a torch supplied to get to the toilet during the night? I’m guessing that there are no lamps to light the way because they’d light up the dome at night too. Or maybe eye masks and earplugs are part of the deal — like sleeping on a long-haul flight.
All in all, this ‘holiday’ is my nightmare. You’d have to pay me that 119€ to spend a night in there!